Once upon a sunny morning a man who sat in a breakfast nook looked up from his
scrambled eggs to see a white unicorn with a golden horn quietly cropping the
roses in the garden. The man went up to the bedroom where his wife was still
asleep and woke her. There's a unicorn in the garden, he said. Eating roses.
She opened one unfriendly eye and looked at him. The unicorn is a mythical
beast, she said, and turned her back on him. The man walked slowly downstairs
and out into the garden. The unicorn was still there; now he was browsing among
the tulips. Here, unicorn, said the man, and he pulled up a lily and gave it
to him. The unicorn ate it gravely. With a high heart, because there was a
unicorn in his garden, the man went upstairs and roused his wife again. The
unicorn, he said,ate a lily. His wife sat up in bed and looked at him coldly.
You are a booby, she said, and I am going to ...Once upon a sunny morning a man who sat in a breakfast nook looked up from his
scrambled eggs to see a white unicorn with a golden horn quietly cropping the
roses in the garden. The man went up to the bedroom where his wife was still
asleep and woke her. There's a unicorn in the garden, he said. Eating roses.
She opened one unfriendly eye and looked at him. The unicorn is a mythical
beast, she said, and turned her back on him. The man walked slowly downstairs
and out into the garden. The unicorn was still there; now he was browsing among
the tulips. Here, unicorn, said the man, and he pulled up a lily and gave it
to him. The unicorn ate it gravely. With a high heart, because there was a
unicorn in his garden, the man went upstairs and roused his wife again. The
unicorn, he said,ate a lily. His wife sat up in bed and looked at him coldly.
You are a booby, she said, and I am going to have you put in the
booby-hatch. The man, who had never liked the words booby and booby-hatch,
and who liked them even less on a shining morning when there was a unicorn in
the garden, thought for a moment. We'll see about that, he said. He walked
over to the door. He has a golden horn in the middle of his forehead, he told
her. Then he went back to the garden to watch the unicorn; but the unicorn had
gone away. The man sat down among the roses and went to sleep.         And As soon as the husband had gone out of the house, the
wife got up and dressed as fast as she could. She was very excited and there was
a gloat in her eye. She telephoned the police and she telephoned a psychiatrist;
she told them to hurry to her house and bring a strait-jacket. When the police
and the psychiatrist arrived they sat down in chairs and looked at her, with
great interest. My husband, she said, saw a
unicorn this morning. The police looked at the psychiatrist and the
psychiatrist looked at the police. He told me it ate a lilly, she said. The
psychiatrist looked at the police and the police looked at the psychiatrist. He
told me it had a golden horn in the middle of its forehead, she said. At a
solemn signal from the psychiatrist, the police leaped from their chairs and
seized the wife. They had a hard time subduing her, for she put up a terrific
struggle, but they finally subdued her. Just as they got her into the
strait-jacket, the husband came back into the house.         Did you tell your wife you saw a unicorn? asked the
police. Of course not, said the husband. The unicorn is a mythical beast.
That's all I wanted to know, said the psychiatrist. Take her away. I'm sorry,
sir, but your wife is as crazy as a jaybird. So they
took her away, cursing and screaming, and shut her up in an institution. The
husband lived happily ever after.         Moral:
Don't count your boobies until they are hatched.